""I wish people were there just to guide me through,"

Here is an article from the Salt Lake Tribune about some children who are aging out of the foster care system.

Dispelling the Myths of Foster Care Adoption

from the Dave Thomas Foundation for Adoption.

CBS News Reports a Drop in the Foster Care Population

Foster care population drops for 6th straight year, though 26,286 of children that left the system "aged out" without  ties to their own parents and with no other home.  Read the story here.

Dispelling Foster Care Myths

An opinion piece written for The Spectrum.com by Amy Bates.

Don't fall for the myths about foster care, adoption



The night before my first-born was scheduled to come into the world, I could not sleep. This was not only because our little "bundle of joy" decided to stick his foot into my rib, but I was just so excited by the thought of becoming his mother.

Here I am, years later, in much the same situation. As I write this article, it is the eve of our 16-year-old son being adopted into our family, and I find myself once again full of the kind of anticipation that does not allow my eyes to close.

Although there are similarities with this addition and our first one, there are some major differences. For one thing, this son will come to us pretty much grown, which is a good thing when you consider the difficulties that giving birth to a 5-foot tall, 80-pound boy might pose. Some might think a soon-to-be mother would be less than ecstatic when thinking about missing out on the baby stage and skipping right to the teen-age part, but not this mom. I am thrilled that most of that is behind me.

Since I have started writing for The Spectrum & Daily News, I have written about adoption and foster care as many times as they will let me. It is a vital part of who I am and a subject that I do not think gets enough attention. Children are suffering, and all of us need to step up and help those who need it most. I could spend my time quoting facts to you about the number of children who are waiting, how long they have to wait, or even the dire predictions made for children who "age out" of the system, but I am not sure that would motivate people to look at what they could do to help. I think it is only when we look at individual cases and hear their stories that we put a face on this heart-wrenching problem.
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Book Review

Here is a short review from Christianity Today on the new book, Orphanology.
Awakening to Gospel-Centered Adoption and Orphan Care
Tony Merida and Rick Morton (New Hope Publishers)

"Christians do not approach orphan care as mere humanitarians but as people adopted by God through the work of Jesus Christ. Orphanology provides the burgeoning orphan care movement with a gospel-centered theological foundation as well as a comprehensive plan for getting involved at many levels, including adoption, orphanage restoration, foster care, and transitional assistance. Between adoption stories, Tony Merida and Rick Morton offer a compelling picture of how the gospel motivates us to action on behalf of the fatherless."

A Foster Father's Experience

From Orlando Sentinel columnist George Diaz:
A Foster Father's Joy - and Heartache



He came to us last October late on a Monday afternoon, wearing a gray tank top and no shoes or socks. All of his possessions were in a plastic Publix grocery bag.

The placement woman from the Children's Home Society had cold-called as she always does, with a calm sense of urgency, looking for foster parents to take in a 22-month-old foster child. There was very little information available about him, but we asked a few questions, took a deep breath, and welcomed "Little Man" into our home.

Eight months later, he was gone. He left a few days ago with a bunch of stuff. Minnie and Donald Duck dolls, a wardrobe of clothes, his cars and trucks, his Mickey Mouse sippy cup, Nike flip-flops and a really cool pair of shoes that light up when he walks.

But this is not about all the gifts we gladly gave him. It is about the treasures he gave to us.
I can't tell you the exact minute that my wife and I fell in love with him.
He officially hooked me when he called me "daddy" for the first time. Then he piled it on:

His way of talking to inanimate objects: "Have a good day, chair!" he would sometimes say on the way out to day care. His persistence in trying to wrap flags around his little waist, wanting to play with us, when I took him to play flag football. His shout-outs of "Springsteen!" when I clicked on the CD player in the car.

And best of all, his way of imploring me to join him in the kitchen for breakfast so he could get his chocolate milk fix. "Come on, daddy," he would say, motioning to me with his little fingers. "I shows you."
It all adds up to one mushy loving mess, and in a heartbeat, we became a family.

That's how this foster parent thing usually works. Kids don't normally end up abused, neglected or in garbage bins, despite the occasional horror story in the media.

Our Little Man was not alone, unfortunately. There are more than 6,000 children living in foster homes in Florida. Each child has a different story, but share one thing in common:
They are innocent bystanders of some dysfunctional mess.

There is always an urgency to find a foster family when they are taken into state custody. Foster parents don't get to window shop, and pick out what they like best.

The foster parent thing isn't a business transaction, despite getting 18 bucks a day from the Florida Department of Children and Families. It's highly personal.

More often than not, there is a quiet resolution. Biological parents stumble, and their kids are given a safe haven while the parents progress through a case-ordered plan addressing their issues. The goal is always reunification, unless there are extreme circumstances where the parental rights are terminated.
There will be pain. But you root for the outcome that will break your heart.
"How can you let him go?" and "I would get too attached" are the lines foster parents always hear. The truth is, we have no super-powers and we get attached and we cry when they leave because your family has been ripped apart.
Through it all, you celebrate the victory of a family that is back together, whole and hopefully healthy.
I fought with every fiber in my body to keep reminding myself of that goal on our last night together when I put him to bed. We laughed and we cuddled as I read him stories from his favorite books.
I closed my eyes so he wouldn't see me crying as he said, "Love you, Daddy," and we hugged it out one last time.
The next morning, we packed his stuff and put him in the car that was taking him back home. One of his sisters was in the other car seat, smiling and happy to see him again.
I keep thinking back to that moment when I start obsessing with my personal heartache.
It is not about me. It is not about my wife. It is all about him.
He is home for Father's Day, and that is good.
Have a good day, Little Man!

To learn about becoming a foster parent, go to http://www.dcf.state.fl.us/.
http://www.orlandosentinel.com/news/opinion/os-ed-george-diaz-foster-parent-0619120110617,0,471223.column

An Essay From a Former Foster Child

Being Resilient
by George Dean

"I entered Community Services at the age of 6 after my dad broke my leg. He threw me on the floor and still to this day, I wonder why. We don’t talk anymore. There have been numerous times I have tried to reconcile with him but to no end, every time was a failure.

I was shuffled in between foster homes and group homes for years, struggling to find out who I was. Not fitting in anywhere. Bullied all the time, beat up and bruised. My mind was like a never ending maze and every way I thought was the way out, led me to a concrete wall. I felt like I could never get through."
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Series of Interviews on Foster Care and Adoption

The Examiner in Dayton, Ohio is presenting a new foster care and adoption interview series. 

"Although social workers and other experts can tell you a lot about the foster care and adoption process, they can't give you the nitty gritty details about the experience. Only someone who has been through the foster care or adoption process can tell you what it is really like."

Continue reading the first interview here.

Helping Foster Children throught the Educational System

"As little as two percent of Americans have experienced foster care, but statistics show that as much as half our homeless population have been involved with the system."


In honor of National Foster Care Awareness Month, Fostering Media Connections, a group dedicated to changing the foster care system through the power of the media, is kicking off a series of town-hall type meetings that address foster children in the educational system.  These meetings titled, "On the Road to Educational Equality" tour can be viewed and streamed live.

Here's a terrific article (and video) about the tour (and foster children & education) written by Daniel Heimpel, Project director of Fostering Media Connections:
On the Road to Educational Equality: Addressing the Educational Needs of Foster Care Youth

For National Foster Care Month: A Video Brochure of Former Foster Youth

"I am here. Don't forget me."



These youth are members of the Foster Care Alumni. 

May is National Foster Care Month

A reminder from Fostering Families Magazine that May is National Foster Care Month.

Each issue of Fostering Families contains great stories about amazing foster parents doing incredible work on behalf of children in their care, plus articles on various programs that are using innovative ideas to benefit kids in care.  For more information or to subscribe go to http://www.adoptinfo.net/. 

Latest Adoption Cost and Wait Time Data from Adoptive Families Magazine

Adoptive Families Magazine has released the results of their annual survey on adoption costs and wait times.  It includes both domestic and international adoption.  It seems the least expensive way to adopt is through the U.S. Foster Care system and the most expensive is adopting from Russia. 

Read the survey results here.

115,000 children in the U.S. foster-care system are waiting for permanent homes

Questions about adopting from foster care are answered by social worker Kathy Ledesma in Adoptive Families Magazine -
A Place to Call Home

Facing the Issue of Foster Care from the CEO of Child Welfare League of America

This is a piece that Christine James Brown wrote for the Huffington Post:

Faced with Faces
Every once in a while I need grounding. Even though I deal every day with the issues facing children in foster care, I sometimes need to stand back -- away from the statistics and policy debates -- to see real children in need of real families. That's one of the reasons I appreciate November's National Adoption Month because it helps focus me on the faces of children in foster care.

Recently, after a long day at the office, I went searching -- my soul and the internet. I was having one of those moments when I needed to reboot. I ran across a segment on DC-based NBC4's Wednesday's Child -- the program that features foster children available for adoption during the news. It was a piece about a talented 14-year-old girl named Jennisfer who had big brown eyes and loves to draw and ride horses. Seeing her story reminded me of my own daughter when she was a child and how special our time together was.
Since I was already drawn in, I watched another segment about David, a cute young boy with Down syndrome who was having a fun-filled day at Gymboree. Both of these children are available for adoption from the foster care system. Despite their challenges it was clear that both children were lovable and in need of being loved. As I watched these two pieces, I choked up thinking again how lucky my own daughter was to have loving parents to share special moments with, help guide her decisions, and just give her a hug.

Still I needed to see more faces to drive home the importance of the work that we in the child welfare world. I logged onto a variety of adoption related sites, including AdoptUSKids.org. Gracing the front were teens Nickayla and Darrien of Kansas. These beautiful siblings with big smiles -- one loves to sing and the other enjoys sports -- desperately want to find a family and most importantly stay together.

Behind each of these faces and stories is a caring child welfare professional, working to ensure that children have a chance to be reunited with families or if this is not possible, have opportunities to get adopted. My hunt for faces and stories of children available for adoption also reminded me of all the outstanding work that child welfare workers do to ensure children get reunited with their birthparents and/or find new ones. These dedicated professionals work tirelessly to ensure a better life for children.

One such professional being honored this month as AdoptUSkids's Caseworker of the Month is Shanda Moorman, an adoption recruiter for Wendy's Wonderful Kids in Orlando who firmly believes that "every child is adoptable." And her work shows that. Due to her persistence and sensitivity, she recently was able to facilitate an interstate adoption of twins with significant medical conditions. Her excitement over seeing photos of the children laughing and happy with their new family showed the pride she takes in her work. Shanda is representative of so many outstanding child welfare professionals who view their profession as a calling.

Why is it important to put faces on this issue? That's because more than 110,000 children in the United States -- who have suffered from abuse and/or neglect -- have nowhere to go. They are wards of the state -- legally released from their families -- and waiting in the foster care system, hoping that a caring adult will come along and make the world right again for them. But 110,000 is just a number -- albeit a big one. Behind that number are real children who lives and futures have been upended and stolen from them by parents and situations that have let them down.

That's why my favorite day of National Adoption Month is National Adoption Day, when communities across the United States celebrate the making of new families. On this day, court systems nationwide help children heal and families come together by legally joining foster children with adoptive families. This ceremonial effort puts a face on the issue and symbolizes the importance of how strong families are the fundamental building blocks for communities.

If you have a few minutes this month, please take the time to search the Internet for the names and faces of children who want nothing more than to be loved. If you have room in your heart and home, consider adopting one. Just as importantly, take a moment to hug and care for your own children. Good parents are in demand... and they make a difference.
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/christine-jamesbrown/faced-with-faces_b_777293.html

CBC of Seminole To Be In Charge of Child Welfare in Orange and Osceola Counties

Here's a story from the Orlando Sentinel by Kate Santich about DCF awarding the contract to run child-welfare operations in both Osceola and Orange counties to Community Based Care of Seminole Co. 

Seminole nonprofit wins DCF contract to manage child welfare in Orange and Osceola

Want to Learn More About the Foster Care System?

Holly Schlaack, a social worker from Ohio, has authored a book titled, Invisible Kids: Marcus Fiesel's Legacy,  which provides an insiders view of the foster care system and educates readers on what they can do to improve that system. 

Amazon says of the book that it "tells the stories of many children and foster families. It tells them straight and backs them up with statistics and facts that show why the system works, why it doesn t, and where it needs help. It describes the special program Holly created for early identification of red flags in the lives infants and toddlers. It details how this program, ProKids Building Blocks, is making a difference, with specialized training and home visitation checklists that assist in objectifying warning signs that might otherwise go unnoticed. It also identifies more than a dozen ways, large and small, anyone can apply to make a difference."


For more information about Holly Schlaak, the book, or her work please visit her website:  http://www.invisiblekidsthebook.com/index.html

How Your Church Can Help Foster Children

This is from the Dave Thomas Foundation for Adoption (which also offers free resources for your church or organization) -

The faith community and foster care adoption

CHILDREN ARE WAITING
Every day children are abused, abandoned and neglected. Through no faults of their own, many end up in foster care and eventually are made available for adoption. These children often move three or more times, are frequently separated from siblings, and can wait five years or more for an adoptive family. One in five will turn 18 and leave the system without a family. Today, more than 114,000 children wait in U.S. foster care for a loving, permanent family.


YOU CAN HELP

The faith community has long been one of the most dynamic, powerful resources to help children without families. The following are just some of the many ways to get involved in foster care adoption – because every child deserves a loving home and forever family.


SUPPORT ADOPTIVE FAMILIES

-Celebrate when members of your congregation make the choice to adopt. Recognize adoption as a valued way to build families.


-Establish support groups for adoptive parents. Learn how at www.nacac.org or http://www.adoptamericanetwork.org/.
 -Host activities and outings for adoptive families.


-Raise funds for medical and educational needs. Donate clothing or other necessities for a growing family. Offer respite childcare.


-Consider establishing an adoption ministry.


HOST OR JOIN A NATIONAL ADOPTION DAY EVENT

National Adoption Day is celebrated in communities across the United States on the Saturday before Thanksgiving (November 20, 2010). Host a National Adoption Day event of your own by inviting members of your congregation or parish to join you for a workshop, picnic, reception or other event in celebration of adoptive families and generate awareness of waiting children. To partner with a local foster care adoption agency, visit www.childwelfare.gov/nfcad. Be a part of the national effort and get a free banner by registering your event at http://www.nationaladoptionday.org/.


-Join an already scheduled event near you by visiting http://www.nationaladoptionday.org/.
There are events in communities all across the nation. Contact the event coordinator to volunteer your time or donate items for the newly-formed families.
 
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Government Statistics on Children in Foster Care

The U.S. Department of Health and Human Services, Administration for Children and Families, Administration on Children, Youth and Families, Children's Bureau reports that 255,418 children entered foster care in 2009 and of those exiting, 20% were adopted.  These and other statistics can be found in the AFCARS Report.

The Role of the Church In Adoption

Churches Adopt Adoption
Churches are getting real about adoption's challenges—and helping families after the child arrives.  By Carla Barnhill

This article is part of Christianity Today's July issue which focuses on adoption and orphan care.
In 1962, my parents picked up a 3-month-old boy from a Minneapolis children's home. Instead of a shower or welcoming committee, they came home to silence and sideways looks. They were adopting at a time when the decision was considered a response to an epic reproductive failure, something not discussed in polite company.

And then there was the baby. At just three months, my older brother showed signs of institutionalization. My mother remembers how he lay in her arms like a board, never able to snuggle. Psychologists were only beginning to form theories on attachment disorder, and no one, including my parents, fully understood how even a few months without parental nurture can impact a child.

Thank God that attitudes about adoption are changing.

The Christian Alliance for Orphans (CAO) held its sixth annual summit on orphan care this April at Grace Church in Eden Prairie, Minnesota. Featuring keynote addresses from John Piper, Steven Curtis and Mary Beth Chapman, and Al Mohler, the summit drew more than 1,200 attendees, most of them ministering to orphans through their home churches. Watching those gathered, I knew this was not my parents' generation.

Continue with article here.

Family Services of Metro Orlando Celebrates It's 1,000th Adoption!

On Friday, June 25, 2010, Family Services of Metro Orlando celebrated its 1,000th foster care adoption with Judge Margaret T. Waller presiding. On the same day, 17 other families celebrated as they adopted more than 20 children into their families.


Eight-year-old Melissa became part of a forever family when she was adopted by Debbie and Joseph Defour, making her the 1000th adoption under Family Services' care. Learn more, or see news coverage at WFTV - 9 Family Connection and the Orlando Sentinel.


This milestone was achieved in fewer than six years through Family Services' extensive network of community partners in Orange and Osceola counties including:
 
Children's Home Society
Youth and Family Alternatives
One Hope United
Devereux Florida
Osceola County Guardians ad Litem
Legal Aid Society of the Orange County Bar Association
Children's Legal Services
Florida Department of Children and Families
Dave Thomas Foundation for Adoption

For more information on foster care and adoption in Central Florida, call 1-877-6-MY-KIDS or visit the Family Services of Metro Orlando website.